Tuesday, May 26, 2015
Can't Save Others, If You You're In A Worse Situation.
I want to get much done, but helping others, I have not made myself a priority. I have writing which has to be done, religious study, health issues to deal with, and I have to look for a new school since I was told I am not part of the future of my current school. (I am going to be careful in how I explain that one.) It seems if you're not careful you can turn your want to help others into a personal crutch or barricade. As practicing Christian I want to help others when they need me or are in trouble. This is something I have been doing for awhile now. However the past few weeks I had to take time to self-reflect. One thing which stands out to me is, to a fault, I've started to place others in front of my needs. I have attached emotional dismay when thinking about not being of service when asked for help. But things needed to change.
This past week I lost a friend from my childhood. She had just sent me a "poke" on Facebook which was her way of saying "hello and how are you." The next day she had a massive heart attack and never recovered. In less than three days my friend was gone. This hit hard because it made me think of myself. Where am I with my health, how close am I to checking out of this life? I was told by my Dr. things had to change in how I was taking care of myself. Back over the Easter break, I was doing so when another problem (my leg) become an issue. I was cleared this week to go back to working out but my leg will be a problem until I get healthier and lose the weight. This is currently my number "1" focus. I have revamped my personal plan and working out. diet, and lifestyle has moved up the list. Its so easy to look at everyone else and try to fix them when your own gorilla is sitting in the room alongside of you. Choke you to death quietly.
Next, my writing has suffered over the past few months. My latest book "Luke Warm Saint" should have been completed since the editor gave the completed work back to me some time ago to work on. I allowed working on another authors book derail my focus as well as school work. I love the work we did on Sister Melinda Harper's book "A Profit to He Husband" <<<<<(please support her book) I am so proud of what we accomplished with creating this book. It is a great read. However, when I should have been writing myself I wasn't. Again it seems I would take on the needs of others and push my work to the side. Then there is my school work. I started to allow my principal and the work I am required to do get out in front of the writing I know needs to be done. I didn't have as much work to do as I allowed myself to think but the little bit I did have grew in my mind. I allowed the frustration of getting the work done to quiet my writing. I see now I have to quiet the noise around me to get my work done.
Finally, my religious standing has been lacking and I have been torn with studying my bible and writing. Sadly my current book "Luke Warm Saint" is an inspirational fiction novella which is reflective of my faith. The two should be a great marriage. Instead I have been procrastinating with both. I also have missed time at church and didn't sit down to work on this story when not in church. I pray often and speak to the Lord daily. I personally know that is not enough. You have to speak to the Lord and then get out and do more. "Faith with out works is death" I know this all so well but yet I embraced procrastination. Can't happen any longer if I am going to make the moves necessary.
I am sitting here writing this blog because I fell behind in my blog writing but also to vent and allow others to see where I am. I figure if I put it out to the world I am and will be accountable to my words. I am revamping my Google schedule this week and I think it may be time to take a break from social media. I did a 30 day fast from the net some time ago. I think it may be time to do so again.
So here is the current plan of action and things I plan on getting done:
- Workouts 3-5 days a week. Keeping a close eye on the leg to make sure its OK after the work.
- Get my current book "Luke Warm Saint" done by the done and re-edited by the second week of June. (the 13. Yes Friday the 13th. I'm not worried. LOL)
- Restart my reading plans on my Bible app and continue to read my bible daily.
- Get 10 to 15 resumes out, to look for a new position.
- Bowl twice a week
- Less social media (1-2 hours in a day no more)
- Blog bi-monthly (Stick to twice a month)
- Read 2 to 3 hours a day (Kindle and Audio books)
- Say no to others and not feel upset about taking care of self.
- Attend more events which are going to help me learn more about my craft.
- Watch less TV. Only when my work is done or along with getting the work done. No just sitting and watch unless everything is complete.
I am glad I got this blog done. I spoke it into existence and now its time to make things happen. I have goals in place and I need to reach them to better myself.
K. L. Belvin